I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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