is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
