Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
my liver is dry heaving
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
