butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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