Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
