I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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