I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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