Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
