i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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