My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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