he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Randomize