So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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