I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
