I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
