My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
