Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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