if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
