I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
I wish I only lived at night.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I fill condoms, not promises.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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