Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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