Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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