Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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