This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
