just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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