Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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