we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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