suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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