wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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