This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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