..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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