Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
