tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
