I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
