I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
