I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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