Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
