My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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