if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
