guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize