I hate your face
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
