My room smells like vodka and shame
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
