Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
