we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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