and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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