No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
He felt like a one man threesome
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
