What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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