It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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