Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
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