D3 body, D1 cock
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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