Is it normal to miss your booty call?
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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