Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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